Struggling to set boundaries? Read me.

I know that setting boundaries can feel really uncomfortable, especially if you’re setting boundaries with someone you care about.

But I think part of why we find it so challenging is because of the way we think about boundaries.

I think a lot of people have an association with boundaries as being harsh, rude, or aggressive.

However...we can set boundaries while still being respectful to the person/people we’re setting the boundary with even if it might not look that way at first glance.

And I think something that a lot of people don’t realise is that setting boundaries isn't just good for you, but it's also good for the people we're setting the boundaries with.

3 ways that other people benefit from our boundaries….
1. Boundaries give people clarity and emotional safety around what is and is not okay with you.
2. When your needs are met and respected, you are more likely to show up as a happier, more supported, less resentful version of you.
3. When you set boundaries you make it okay for other people to set boundaries too.

We’re in the thick of the holiday season - a time where emotions may run high and boundaries may be tested. Here are a few examples of what healthy boundaries might sound like at this time of year.
✨ “I’d love to see you but I’m feeling stretched quite thin and need some time to myself. I’ll reach out to you soon”. 
✨ “When you say X…what I’m hearing is” 
✨ "When I share my feelings with you and get criticised, it makes me shut down. I can only keep this conversation going if we both have space to express ourselves without criticism”. 
✨ “I will be there, but will have to leave around X time”. 
✨ “I want to be here for you, but I’m not in the best place to talk about it right now. Do you think we can come back to this later?” 
✨ “I’d love to see you but I am feeling stretched thin and need some time to myself right now”. 
✨ “Thanks for asking (optional) but I’m not up for discussing that.” 
✨ "I need some time to myself".

Sending you a bit of extra courage all holiday season to set the healthy boundaries that you and everyone will benefit from.